How To Find Who I Am
Worth Your Time!
Resource Recommendations to Help You Parent and Mentor Most Effectively
This Week's Recommendation:
"Finding Your Best Identity: A Short Christian Introduction to Identity, Sexuality, and Gender"
By Andrew Bunt
Read It Here
“It's right and good to ask the question, 'Who am I?' But there's actually another question that needs to be asked before this, a question we rarely think to ask. That question is 'How do I find who I am?'"
Why It's Worth Your Time
Identity - especially regarding issues of sexual attraction and gender identity - is probably the hottest topic among teens in this cultural moment. Rather than ignoring it, we need to engage it in a healthy and biblically faithful way. Bunt's short, 75-page book provides a simple framework for guiding teens through these and other identity-related issues - it doesn't apply only to sexual attraction and gender identity.
How To Use It
I would suggest using it in one of two ways:
Read it alongside a teen and discuss it.
Read it yourself and use his framework to guide your discussions with teens.
Remember that teens may find their identity in many other places as well: sports performance, academic achievement, musical ability, social groups/social standing (either positive or negative), etc. Bunt's framework can help you address those tendencies as well.
As always, remember the value of well-asked questions that cause a teen to think - and to think about how they think.
"Where do you think the people around you find their identity? Why do you think they choose to define themselves in those ways?"
"Where do you tend to find your own identity? Why do you think those are the things that define you?"
"Do you think you tend to find your identity in how others view you? Do you define your own identity?"
After reading the book, you'll have a helpful framework that will enable you to explore their answers further with more good questions and point them to the BEST place to find their identity!
Note: Bunt is a celibate, same-sex attracted man who has struggled with identity issues, and he weaves his personal story into the book; however, he does believe in the biblical sexual ethic that sex is reserved for marriage between one man and one woman. He also believes that our true identity should be found only in Christ. Readers may not agree with everything he says or how he says it. Nevertheless, I do believe his simple framework exploring the options for where to find our identity is useful and worth reading.
Read It Here
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